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"Do you hate people?"
"I don't hate them…I just feel better when they're not around."–Charles Bukowski, Barfly
Do you identify with this quote?
Is it hard for you to really like a lot of people?
If you've ever wondered why, you may find your answers in some of the reasons below.
Talk to a certified and experienced therapist to find ways to make people like you better and build meaningful relationships. You may want to trytalk to one about BetterHelp.comfor quality care in the most comfortable way.
1. The experiences you've had with people so far in life have messed up your view of the world.
Our beliefs are shaped by our experiences, and if you had a childhood (or any other time in your life) where you were mistreated, you can expect the same from everyone.
maybe you havetoxic parentsthat he didn't treat you right (and still doesn't) or was bullied at school.
Or perhaps you experienced a traumatic life event involving a person who caused you physical and/or emotional harm.
Something like that could have made you want to send a black mark to all of humanity.
Maybe you don't like people because you have been around very unpleasant people in the past.
2. You want to avoid getting hurt again.
If you don't like people, don't let them in. And if you don't let them in, the chances of them harming you are much less.
If you can relate to the point above, you probably have a hard time trusting people.
Without confidence, you will have a hard time getting to know someone and if you can't get to know someone, how can you expect to like them?
Your desire to avoid injury creates barriers between you and others.
3. See people asSatin.
Perhaps you are not a materialistic person and do not crave wealth or fame.
But you see other people dressing like them, taking selfies for the 'Gram (or Facebook or some other social network), and buying flashy cars.
Everyone seems so conceited to you. They are obsessed with having the latest gadgets or fads and you can't help but make fun of them.
You just can't do anything with it.
4. You view people as self-centered and self-centered.
I i i! You feel like everyone is only interested in themselves.
conversational narcissismabounds and social interactions are nothing more than opportunities to stroke each other's egos.
You see the biggest problems in the world and communities and you want to do something about it, but you seem alone in a crowd of people who don't care if society falls apart around you.
5. You compare social media profiles to what people are really like.
You see those selfies and updates that scream "pay me some attention!" and you think that this is how these people are in real life.
They don't wonder who the person behind the pictures is and what interesting things they might be doing or thinking.
And you also don't take into account the things they might be struggling with.
They don't realize that social media is just a facade on real life. It hides much more depth.
6. You expect people to be perfect.
Humans are chaotic creatures full of positive and negative traits.
But no matter how many good qualities a person may have, their flaws catch up with them and bam! they are no longer lovable.
They judge people harshly, probably to keep them at a distance to avoid injury, as discussed in #2.
7. Do yousurpassed your friendships.
You have so-called friends, but you don't like them either.
This is usually because you haveAdultfaster than them and finds himself "old before his time".
It takes you away from them if you find their nonsense about getting drunk or reality TV boring.
And you can't help but think that everyone but you should be like this.
8. You don't particularly like yourself either.
We often project feelings into the world that actually reflect our inner feelings.
This certainly doesn't apply to everyone, but if you really think you don't like people, that could be it.you don't like yourself very much.
And you deal with those internal feelings of self-loathing by insisting that no one is worth it, least of all yourself.
This ties in strongly with point 6, which deals with the imperfection of humans. When you focus on your own flaws, you tend to look for flaws in others as well.
In addition, you find it difficult to get along with other people who feel good. They seem conceited and hypocritical to you, and that makes you angry.
9. You don't feel like you can be yourself around other people.
A part of you thinks that people wouldn't want them to see the real you.
For you, this is just one more reason not to want her in return.
If they can't like who you really are, then why should you like who they really are?
You think there's no use living in a mask, so you decide not to try to make friends.
10. You see people making stupid decisions all the time.
In his eyes you can see everyone making strange decisions day after day.
You see these decisions as absolutely stupid and it really bothers you when people do that.
You just can't see how you can like someone who does stupid things like that.
11. You get angry easily.
Little things just annoy you and cloud your attitude towards people.
You have a low tolerance for behavior that you find unacceptable or disruptive.
And because you get irritated with things and people, you find it hard to really like someone.
12. You hate small talk.
By God, you can't bear to get involved in any form of small talk. It seems so completely meaningless to you.
But people seem to insist, not just when you meet them, but even after years of knowing you.
They just don't want to hear about that dodgy kebab they ate over the weekend or that DIY project they're doing. And it just goes off as soon as someone mentions the weather.
Are you sure there are better things to talk about?
13. You hate gossip.
If there's one thing you hate more than small talk, it's gossip.
The moment someone complains about a mutual acquaintance, you feel anger boiling up inside of you.
You think that if they have a problem with someone, they should just confront it and fix it.
And then there's trust: you just can't hurt that person again because their mouth is open.
14. You are going through a difficult time.
If you're struggling with something right now, it could cloud your entire view of humanity.
And you certainly find it hard to feel good around someone who isn't going through the same thing as you.
You resent their joy and even wish them bad things just to bring them down where you are.
15. You read the news and it depresses you.
The world is full of terrible people. At least that's the conclusion one comes to after reading bad news about bad news.
It doesn't occur to you that the news lingers in pain and anguish and that no one ever reports the good things that good people are doing around the world.
All you can see is a reason to walk away from people because otherwise you will regret it.
16. You are a cynic.
You just don't believe that people are naturally kind or likable or can be trusted.
They believe that people look for number one and therefore expect the worst of them.
Your cynicism makes it hard for people to like you, but also for people to like you.
17. You are an introvert but you don't know it.
No, introverts don't naturally like other people.
But if you don't like people, you're probably an introvert.
And as an introvert, you feel drained by excessive interaction with people and the mental stimulation that comes with it.
But you may not know you're an introvert, and you may mistake your feeling of exhaustion for a belief that you don't like a certain person or person.
Because if you liked them, you wouldn't feel exhausted after interacting with them.
18. They struggle to find the time and energy to form and maintain true friendships.
Your wish would be to meet someone, be good friends right away, and then have them in your life to see how and when you want, but probably rarely.
You can't handle the work and effort it takes to build a friendship, and you can't meet the demands that many friendships place on you to maintain them.
And so you don't make many friends and you tend to stay away from the ones you do have.
This could be related to your introverted nature and/or the possibility that you have low energy.
19. You use "I don't like people" as a defense mechanism.
You try hard to really like people and people seem to have a hard time liking you.
You want to like peoplesomepeople) but can't seem to find the right people to befriend.
Instead of admitting this to yourself and others, hide your true feelings by saying, "Okay, I don't like people anyway."
20. You struggle to break free of this thought pattern.
Sometimes the thoughts we have can get stuck in our heads and it is very difficult to get rid of them.
Like an incessant weed, no matter how many times you challenge these thought patterns, they always seem to come back.
And so they become his default, which he eventually comes to believe is true because he can no longer fight them.
How to overcome these thoughts and like people again.
It would be nice to be able to tell you that there is a quick and easy solution to your feelings towards other people.
But there isn't.
You will probably struggle with such feelings throughout your life.
But you can change your thoughts and beliefs enough to go from "I don't like people" to "I don't like people."manyPeople."
You can find ways to please certain people. The right people with whom you can feel comfortable.
But in reality, this will require some serious self-reflection on your part and most likely the help of a board-certified psychiatrist.
The way you think and feel about people is probably rooted in your past, and it's best to unwrap that past with proper guidance.
A professional can also provide you with some tools to help you question some of the reasons listed above.
With these tools, you will be able to build and maintain at least some relationships with people whose presence in your life you value.
We recommend the online therapy service ofmejorayuda.com– You can speak with a trained and experienced therapist from the comfort of your home, whenever it is most convenient for you.Here is the link againfor more information on this process.
Be determined, take one step at a time, and expect setbacks along the way.
But you can do it. You have already taken the first step.
You may like:
- What to do when you hate your friends
- 9 Types of Friends You Can Ditch (Without Feeling Bad About It)
- Be happy alone: 10 tips for life and being alone
- 9 advantages of living as a loner and why you shouldn't be ashamed of being one
- "Why don't people like me?" - 9 reasons why people don't want to be your friend
- "I have no friends" - 10 useful tips if you want to make some
Why we don't like some people? ›
We may dislike them because we are afraid of them. They are sarcastic, or they are likely to make fun of us to our backs. We may dislike them because they deflate our ego. They boss us, they are domineering, they know more than we know, or in some way make us feel smaller.Why I don't like someone for no reason? ›
Jealousy is often a big reason for disliking someone for no apparent reason. Jealousy results from upward social comparison. You see someone who's better than you or has what you want, and you feel jealous. Jealous people are motivated to put down those they're jealous of.Why people we like don't like us? ›
More often than not, when we're really attracted to someone, but they don't like us nearly as much in return, it's because we are in that space of insecurity, neediness and unworthiness. We feel like we're not good enough and we're nervous about being rejected.Why do I feel like a lot of people don't like me? ›
Anxiety can manifest in many different ways, and one of those ways is in worrying about what people think of you. If the thought of social contact with others makes you fearful or causes symptoms of anxiety, you may have social anxiety that's causing you to worry that people don't like you.What is it called if you don't like people? ›
Misanthropy is the general hatred, dislike, distrust, or contempt of the human species, human behavior, or human nature. A misanthrope or misanthropist is someone who holds such views or feelings.Is it common to dislike people? ›
It is completely normal to have negative perceptions toward other people and feel like you hate everyone, especially if you feel like you have been slighted in any way. Feeling hatred, one of the most powerful negative emotions that a person can experience, is also part of human nature.What do people usually dislike? ›
- Birthday dinners.
- Splitting the check at a birthday dinner.
- That one rich friend who says, "OK let's just split the bill evenly" when you all got differently priced things.
- Dropping your phone in front of people (it draws more attention to it).
It's okay. It doesn't make you a negative person, as long as you understand why and how to go about not liking them in a productive, mostly innocuous way. Dealing amicably with people we don't like is part of adult life. It doesn't make us fake.Why do I want people that don't want me? ›
Romantic rejection stimulates parts of the brain associated with motivation, reward, addiction, and cravings. Being romantically rejected can be a familiar feeling that mirrors one's childhood, leading that person to seek out more of the same.Why do some people just not get along? ›
When you don't get along with someone, it is generally because you don't feel safe with them. The way they think or behave probably threatens you, who you are, or what you value. Because you don't feel safe, you will subconsciously see them as wrong, less, bad or worse than you.
What do you do when someone doesn't like you for no reason? ›
- What to do when someone doesn't like you for no reason.
- Don't make assumptions.
- Practice self-awareness.
- Focus on self-improvement.
- Don't own others' feelings.
- Face conflict head-on.
- Beware of approval-seeking behaviors.
- Go where you're celebrated.
More important, you can choose not to fall in love with someone. To be precise, you can choose to avoid situations where you might fall for somebody you shouldn't. Just as important—but more difficult in practice—you can choose to try to stop being in love with someone who turns out to be wrong for you.What to do if you cant stop liking someone? ›
- Actually commit to the process.
- Keep your distance.
- Take a break from the friendship.
- Maintain emotional distance.
- Unfollow them on social media.
- Avoid triggers.
- Acknowledge all the reasons it realistically wouldn't work.
- Focus your energy elsewhere.