How to stop hating yourself — and why you do it in the first place (2023)

So you hate yourself? Why is it like this? Has anyone ever told you that you look ugly, that you're boring, that you're not rich enough, or that something happened that made you feel disgusted with yourself?

Be happy because if you love yourself as much as your loved ones love you, but unfortunately there are people who hate themselves more than others. They hate the way they look, they hate the way they talk, they hate the way they smile, they hate the fact that they are not capable enough, they hate the fact that they are not loved enough; They just can't stop hating themselves for being treated negatively by others.

I'm sure you can easily list a few or many things you don't like about yourself and if you really couldn't find even one of those things, then I have to congratulate you because you're well on your way down a path that will lead you. to success, respect and happiness wherever you go. But if you really hate yourself, or even a part of yourself, then you should know that you are on a path that will only lead to misery, disrespect, and failure, and don't tell me these are the things you want .

Everyone wants to be loved, respected, happy, confident, and successful, and I can guarantee that your self-loathing will never get you everything you want. Therefore, it is very important that you stop hating yourself, no matter how ugly you think or how bad you feel, because if you don't stop hating yourself, it will be very difficult for others not to hate you.

Knowing how to stop hating yourself comes next, the first thing you need to know is why you might hate yourself. There is definitely a reason for this, and it is the comparison metrics stored in your memories (subconscious) that cause you (your intellect) to compare yourself (your self-image) to others.

Suppose if someone told you that you have a very small nose and you started to think that small noses are ugly or undesirable, you would probably start to hate the shape of your nose, but actually, the nose is not that nose. problem, your comparison is .

This is how we start to hate ourselves, which is nothing other than the opinions and perspectives of other people that we care about. You see, people's opinions are not negative, but how you handle those opinions and criticism determines how you feel about yourself.

(Video) 7 Signs You Hate Yourself

The other reason could be guilt. Whether it's guilt over failure, guilt over not being good enough, guilt over venting anger, guilt over hurting someone, or any other type of guilt. Guilt, for whatever reason, will always drive you away from your memories, and that means your memories are raging.

So the two main reasons you hate yourself are lack of self-love or self-acceptance and feelings of guilt. Because of this, you constantly compare everything you care about to the things you think are ideal, and that comparison is what makes you hate yourself depending on where you are in that comparison.

You should know that the fact that you hate yourself will also make others hate you, and the only one to blame for this will be you, not them. There will be no reason for you to hate others for hating you, as your own vibrational field will be polluted with low frequency vibrations that will only attract similar vibrations from other people in the form of their hate and disrespect. Basically, this means that people are not responsible for hating you, but you are causing them to hate you.

Additionally, self-hatred leads to a drop in self-confidence along with a drop in self-esteem and saps your energy, leaving you lethargic and unwilling to participate in life. Not to mention that your interpersonal relationships will suffer a lot and you will try to distance yourself from people for fear of being judged or mistreated.

You can become a negative person who criticizes all kinds of situations, and even if a person really likes you, you will find it sarcastic because the compliment contradicts the image you have of yourself. Therefore, it is very important that you learn to stop hating yourself so as not to distance yourself from the peace and happiness that life has in store for you.

In order for you to stop hating yourself, you have to accept the fact that all people are not created equal and there is no such thing as perfection. There is no ideal physical appearance, there is no ideal bank account, there is no ideal personality, and that means there is no one perfect person on this earth.

But since you think that something or someone is ideal, you wish to be like them, but that is a faulty mindset.

Until you change your perspective, you won't be able to stop hating yourself, and the following practices can help you harness the love and respect in your heart for yourself.

(Video) How To Stop Hating Yourself!

Find the reason for your hate:

The fact that you can't face looking at yourself is proof enough that something inside you is pulsing with the burn of your hate, which could be your nose, your smile, your hair, your sense of humor, your shy personality, your bike. . , your car or anything else you consider below average.

Ask yourself "what I hate about myself" and write down all the things you hate about yourself. You have to come face to face with whatever you hate about yourself and pay attention to it with a modicum of judgement.

The fact is that whatever we don't like about ourselves, we try to ignore or avoid paying attention to, but by doing so we end up sending out a lot of negative energy and making it stronger. We try to fight or deny reality, and it is this friction that suffers the most.

So, make a list of all the things you hate about yourself and then you need to pay full attention and make peace with those things to get rid of those painful frictions. Just pay attention to them and see what thoughts and emotions come up, but don't fight them or go with them.

This is very important because it will help clear the negative energy associated with that particular thing of yours and when the energy blockage is cleared you will feel so much better about being yourself. In other words, if you accept that you're not pretty (without making other judgments), you'll get over it. Just try it.

Get over yourself:

If it's in your power to create positive change for yourself, why haven't you done it? Make intentions, get up and take action when you know it will make you feel better or stop you from hating yourself.

If you feel that your body is out of shape, go to the gym, exercise regularly and build muscle. If you feel like your sense of humor isn't good, work on improving your sense of humor (yes, you can, but you need to work on your conscience to do it). If you feel like you're not earning enough and you hate yourself, don't complain, do something, whatever, but ethically.

Hesitation or laziness can be the reason for not taking action and it means that you lack the willpower and the willpower comes from the weak conscience in you.

(Video) Overcoming Self-Hatred

So if you can do something, do it and if you can't, accept it as it is and move on because there's no point complaining or bullying yourself. What you are today or the situation you are in now is the result of your subconscious beliefs and may be the punishment for your past karma.

Stop comparing yourself to others:

Consciously or unconsciously, we are all programmed to compare ourselves with others, and this comparison creates in us a feeling of lack or inferiority, which can also turn into self-hatred.

So what do we do? Stop comparing us to others, but is it that simple? NO. Your habit of comparing reflects your lack of control over your own intellect, and if you don't control it, you will continue to pile yourself up in misery. And how do you gain control of your intellect? Work on your conscience (not on your mind).

Find the difference:

Why do you have to constantly compare yourself to others? Why can't you accept that they are different and you too? The sooner you accept this fact, the sooner your self-loathing will dissipate.

They say that God created us all in his image and likeness (which, honestly, I don't believe), but we humans put different labels on those images. Accept that you cannot become like others, and neither can others become like you. Our differences are what separates us from each other, and you must accept those differences without complaining, no matter what.

Error free:

As I told you before, lack of self-love is one of the reasons for your self-hatred and the other main reason is guilt. No matter what you did or what happened or what happened to you, it makes you feel guilty because what happened happened and thinking about it negatively will only prevent you from making corrections.

Accept everything you did knowing it had to happen and your karma will take care of it and ask for forgiveness like a man and try to make amends if you can.

To be honest, the way you behave is not in your control (it should be, but it isn't). Your subconscious dictates how you think, feel, and act, so blame your subconscious for that. You can forgive yourself as long as you know that your subconscious is driving you to do all these bad things and that you are doing something to get rid of them. Breaking free from the stronghold of our subconscious and subconscious is the only purpose of human life that 99.9% of people do not even think about.

(Video) What I Had to Do to Stop Hating Myself

Accept and let go:

Holding on to the failures and mistakes of the past will not brighten your future; In fact, it will do just the opposite. So let go of all the past memories and failures that make you feel guilty and keep hating yourself.

You don't have to judge the things that separate you from others, or how people treat you, or the failures that life has thrown at you, because when you do, those things will start to shape your beliefs and you. I will come back to this article in the future or search for "how to stop worrying" because then you will face similar things.

For example, if you didn't live up to someone's expectations and they called you a failure, you may start to feel disgusted or worthless, and you may start to hate yourself for it, which would send the wrong messages to your subconscious that you are a failure. failure. . . Instead, accept the result/result, but don't mark it as a failure, and the only way to do that is to avoid worrying too much about the results.

that failsis for you can be a success for someone else and vice versa. We've all been programmed to work for results, and that's a faulty mindset. Work with joy, not for results, because they are not in our hands. If you can give it your all while enjoying your work without obsessing over the results, then the probability of achieving that result is greatly increased.

But if you give everything, you see the work as a burden, but you are determined to achieve the result, then the chances of success are slim. You see, despair increases the chance of failure, while detachment increases the chance of success.

Detachment from results can be the result of knowing that "whatever should happen will happen, and whatever shouldn't happen won't happen," and that is the eternal truth.

See yourself as energy:

Without going too deep, I want to say that if you hate yourself or others, you should stop identifying with your body and/or your mind. This means that you have to start looking at yourself as energy (consciousness, which is your real self) because mind and body can be higher or lower, but consciousness cannot.

In a nutshell, you can think of yourself as a point light source located in the center of your forehead, ruling your mind and body (in fact, when the energy of consciousness reaches there, it opens your intelligence, otherwise , is located at the base). of the spine from where it delivers a limited amount of energy to various points on the body to support the mind and body).

(Video) Stop Hating Yourself (Steve Harvey, Jim Rohn, Les Brown, Jordan Peterson) Best Motivational Speech

Begin to see yourself as such by fully remembering the basic nature of energy and I promise you that you will surely stop hating yourself for hating your mind (your beliefs, your behavior, your state, etc., etc.).

Remember that people are not perfect, situations are not always favorable and the inevitable cannot be avoided. So make peace with your present, and the day you start loving yourself (connecting with your true self) will be the day people stop hating you. It doesn't matter what you look like, who you are, or what you do. This is the power of positive vibes.

TBH, you can't expect to love yourself without working on your conscience. So before you go, remember that if you haven't worked on your conscience, you have failed as a human being, and that would be a shame.


1. Jordan Peterson | Hating Yourself
(Prof. Peterson)
2. Finding the Middle Way - The Listening Heart
(Baba Ram Dass)
3. How to stop hating yourself and your life
(Penny Tovar)
4. HOW TO STOP HATING YOURSELF | Overcome Self-Shame | Wu Wei Wisdom
(Wu Wei Wisdom)
5. Stop Sabotaging Yourself | Debi Silber | TEDxFultonStreet
(TEDx Talks)
6. Self-Hatred & Anxiety
(The School of Life)


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